


Prayers

by sophie_15



Category: Lucifer (TV)
Genre: Angst, Character Death, Eventual Fluff, Explicit Language, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Near Death Experiences
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-14
Updated: 2021-02-28
Packaged: 2021-03-15 17:27:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 8
Words: 19,078
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29439696
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sophie_15/pseuds/sophie_15
Summary: Set after the Series 4 Finale, when Lucifer returns to Hell.No Michael, just some angst, some eventual fluff and everything in-between.I've warned of: major character death, but it will all not be what it seems! :)
Relationships: Chloe Decker & Lucifer Morningstar, Chloe Decker & Trixie Espinoza & Lucifer Morningstar, Chloe Decker/Lucifer Morningstar, Chloe Decker/Trixie Espinoza
Comments: 27
Kudos: 74





	1. You Could Be Happy

**Author's Note:**

> Hello Everyone!
> 
> So this is the first fic I have written in 14 years, I was a little nervous about posting but decided to just go with it.
> 
> The story starts when Lucifer returns to Hell. Poor Chloe, is not having an easy time.
> 
> Every Chapter will be named after a song, which I feel connects in someway to the Chapter, I'll highlight the title and artist at the beginning of each chapter if you fancy listening to it too!
> 
> Any kudos/comments will be greatly appreciated!
> 
> Thank you so much :)

**Chapter One: You Could Be Happy**

_You Could Be Happy- Snow Patrol_

Chloe opened her eyes, he was no longer standing in front of her. Now, all she could see was the never ending landscape of LA stretching beneath her, as far as her eyes could see. Her deepest fear of losing him, had become a reality. She was now alone on the balcony, hearing the cars and the distant sounds of the city below her. Knowing people were out enjoying their evening, carrying on with their lives while hers had just crumbled around her, it was enough to make her feel physically sick. The LA breeze suddenly felt colder as she became aware of the tears beginning to trickle down her cheeks. His words were just playing over and over again in her head “ _It was you Chloe, it always has been.’_ She felt the bile rise to her throat. All of this time, all of the years of the ‘will they, won’t they’ between them, the chance of anything ever happening between them, any sort of future together had been ripped away.

Chloe screwed her eyes shut, desperately trying to contain the oncoming panic attack she could feel starting to overtake her body. Her body was shaking, finding it hard to grasp a single breath. It felt like the whole world was spinning around her at a hundred miles per hour, but she was stuck motionless in the middle. The all-encompassing feeling of panic was hitting her all at once. Then came the guilt, hitting her like a bus. This was all her fault. If she had not reacted the way she did, if she hadn’t run off to Europe, bringing Father Kinley into their lives, this may not have happened. He would still be here, with her.

Chloe’s energy had been drained from her body, she found herself on her knees on the balcony. Her legs now unwilling to hold up her body weight. She couldn’t help but just scream into the night sky. God was real, maybe he would hear her? Maybe he could bring Lucifer back? Then again, she knew Lucifer, had never had a good relationship with his Father, so her screaming into the night sky was likely to be of no use. Chloe didn’t care though. The hurt cursing through her body was like nothing she had felt, not since her Dad had died. It was the feeling that your heart had been physically ripped out of your chest.

 _“He doesn’t deserve this. He’s a good man. Bring him home.”_ Chloe couldn’t help but just speak into the night sky. She wasn’t quite sure who she was talking to. Was she just speaking aloud for her own satisfaction, or was she secretly hoping that God was listening and he would plop Lucifer back on the balcony and fix everything?

Chloe took a moment to look at the night sky, she could just about make out a few stars. The beautiful stars, he had long created. How could she even cope looking at the night sky anymore? They will always be a constant reminder, that the man she loved, had created and placed the stars there himself. Her Lightbringer.

Chloe managed to find an ounce of energy to push herself up off the balcony floor. Managing to get her shaking legs into the penthouse. Even though her body felt like every piece of her energy had been sucked away. As she walked into the penthouse, she took a moment to look at it. Exactly how he liked it, and of course it would be as he had only just left. She noticed his signature glass of whisky sitting on the top of the piano. She began to wonder what was the last song he had played on those keys. As she walked to the piano, she reminisced their first meeting. God, how he had infuriated her that day, and well most days after that if she was being honest. Although now, she could not imagine a life without him. As she lay her hand on the piano, she could still smell the slight aroma of smoke, a cigarette sitting in the ashtray next to his drink. Chloe couldn’t help but slam her hand against the piano. _“WHY? WHY?”_ She was screaming again, to the sky. Searching for some sort of answer, an answer she knew deep down she wasn’t going to get.

There was only one place she wanted to be in that moment. So she made her way to Lucifer’s bed. Covered in his favourite black silk sheets. As she laid down on them, the cooling sensation was welcomed. She grabbed his pillow, burying her face into it. Relishing in being able to smell him. The mix of expensive aftershave, with a slight hint of smoke. To her the smell was just familiar, like home. She thought it might help, but if anything it just made things worse. Although, she may have felt nearer to him, for just a minute it was just not close enough. _“Come home, please.”_ Chloe gripped onto the pillow, as if her life depended on it. Trying to take in the smell of him as much as she could. She knew, one day the smell would fade. The thought just hurt her heart even more.

* * *

Chloe sat up in a panic, her breathing was laboured and beads of sweat trickling down her neck. It took her a little moment to realise where she was, and to realise it was real, it wasn’t just some awful nightmare. She grabbed her phone on the bed next to her, she looked at the time. **04.05am.** Chloe didn’t even remember falling asleep. The events of yesterday, meant it was a long day anyway, and with the added departure of Lucifer, it had left her emotions in utter turmoil, ending up with her crying herself to sleep. She couldn’t even remember the last time she had done that, probably not since her Dad had died. Even after her split with Dan, she had never cried herself to sleep. But this wasn’t just a break-up, this was pure grief.

Her thoughts turned to Linda. Not just because she was a therapist, but she’d turned out to be a very good friend. With the added bonus of understanding all the celestial madness. Chloe knew it was the early hours of the morning, but she had to text her, she needed to see her, she needed to have some sort of purpose for the upcoming day. Bringing up her name, she sent her a message.

**_‘Sorry it’s late/early, whatever you want to call it. Can I come see you in the morning? C x._ **

Chloe was surprised when she got nearly an instant text back **: _‘I seem to be always awake these days with Charlie anyway! Of course you can, 9 o’clock okay? Is everything alright? L xx_**

Chloe sent off her reply, a quick thank you. Right now, she couldn’t stomach going into details. Couldn’t bear to write out the words, to admit to not only herself, but a friend that he was gone. She knew it would make it all more real, and right now she didn’t think she could cope with it.

Chloe knew, she would have to speak about it at some point, she would have to start with Linda, then the LADP and oh god… she’d have to tell Trixie. She knew, her little girl loved him like another father figure. She knew, telling Trixie it would break her heart. Chloe couldn’t help but smile softly, at the thought of Lucifer’s relationship with Trixie. The confusion and disgust of the ‘ _little urchin’_ in the beginning, but then Chloe had watched their bond grow and develop over the years. Chloe knew, despite Lucifer’s usual distain against children, he loved her.

With five hours to waste before she could see Linda, and sleep not feeling like an option, Chloe headed to the bar. Drink not being her usual go-to but at this present time and with the extreme circumstances it seemed a viable distraction. She headed from the bedroom along to the bar, grabbing a bottle of whiskey from the endless collection. As she put the bottle on the bar, she realised it looked ridiculously expensive, probably costing Lucifer as much as her yearly wage with the LAPD, yet Lucifer always drank it like it was water. She poured herself a decent measure in the glass, gulping it down without a thought, before automatically adding another large measure in. Chloe walked around the bar, taking a seat on the stool. She sat there, leaning her elbows on the bar, her head in her hands, she found herself closing her eyes. Trying desperately to remember the memory of his face. For now, it was clear- the black suit, the white shirt, his perfectly preened hair. But she knew, one day this image would just be a distant memory she couldn’t quite remember. She wouldn’t remember the small details of his face, the way he smelt, the sound of his voice. Chloe didn’t know if it was the alcohol or the grief, or maybe a mix of both but she found herself talking to Lucifer.

 _“Lucifer”_ She was back crying, her voice quiet and broken. “ _I don’t want you to go… I mean, you’ve already gone. But I want you home, your real home…with me.”_ Chloe took another sip of her drink, appreciating the distraction of the heat of the alcohol travelling down her throat. “ _I’m sorry, I didn’t tell you sooner…that I loved you. Because I really do and I…”_ Chloe slammed the glass down. What the hell was she doing? Talking to him? He was gone, and she was just making it all worse for herself.

* * *

Lucifer hated hell. He hated the atmosphere, he hated the smell and the constant fall of ash. It had never been his home, and even less so now. Since his years on Earth, and his therapy sessions with Linda, he had also learnt that LA wasn’t home either, but Chloe was. For Chloe, it was likely he had only been gone a few hours or so, but for him it had already been a year or so, but who knew in Hell. That was one of the Hellish things about Hell, you could never quite grasp how much time had passed in comparison to Earth.

Lucifer sat on the throne, he’d done a sweep of Hell and now as he sat there, everything was quiet for a moment. Well, apart from the distant screams of those below him. He was finding it difficult to have the patience, or the energy to deal with anyone right now. The only thing, that plagued his mind was the want to be back with his Detective. But he knew, deep down that was not in his reach, not anymore. He had a duty, as the King of Hell to keep everyone safe, and he could not possibly risk the consequences even if it meant destroying his happiness. As he sat there, he felt the electric buzz travel down his spine. He shuffled a little in his throne, with an audible groan. _“Great, a prayer.”_ Not what he wanted, some odd prayer, probably from some deranged psychopath with some mumblings of the Dark Lord himself.

But as heard the voice, he could have sworn his heart stopped for a moment.

_“But I want you home, your real home….with me.”_

It was her, his Detective. He could hear the pain her voice, almost hear the tears rolling down her cheeks. This was Hell, like he was in his own personal Hell Loop, having to listen to his Detective, broken and there was nothing he could do about it. He would do anything to go back to her, hold her and tell her that he will never leave again.

_“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you sooner, told you I love you, because I really do and have for a long time and I…”_

His regrets mirrored hers. He wish he had told her how much she truly meant to him. The regret, of not making it painstakingly obvious that he loved her too. He was so angry. This was his bloody father’s doing. Was this his plan? To make him understand the pain of losing someone you love? His knuckles began to turn white as he gripped his throne. Before he knew it, a huge chunk came off in his hand. He looked up at the dark, ashy sky before letting out a growl, only the Devil could make.

 _“Fuck you, Dad.”_ He muttered, as a single tear escaped rolling down his cheek.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you enjoyed the first chapter!
> 
> I know it's a little sad, but things will get better for poor Chloe.
> 
> Next chapter, is just a short one- Chloe pays a visit to our favourite therapist Linda Martin.


	2. Bruises

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> So- just a small second chapter! Hope you enjoy it nevertheless.
> 
> Chloe goes off to visit Linda.
> 
> Kudos and Comments will be greatly appreciated!

**Chapter Two: Bruises**

_Bruises- Lewis Capaldi_

After her alcohol consumption just four hours previously, Chloe opted to walk to Linda’s. Being a Detective, and getting pulled over for drinking under the influence was not something she wanted to add to the troubles she had at the moment. The walk helped slightly, strolling in the LA sunshine she watched as everyone went about their daily lives. Parents walking their children to school, people walking to work, people going to do their shopping. Although the fresh air was welcoming, her thoughts always came back to Lucifer. Stuck in the pits of Hell, in the dark (well, she guessed it was dark) and alone. It felt a bit odd to be walking around without him. The last three years, even when they were not working together, they had spent a relatively large amount of time with each other. Now, she found herself missing his body walking beside hers, the 6ft 3 presence she had become used to and trying to keep up with his ridiculously huge strides he took, thanks to his long legs. But now, it felt like someone had ripped her right arm off, it felt empty without him.

As she approached Linda’s door, she cautiously knocked at the door. Felling the nervousness creep all over her body. Her hands were sweating, she quickly wiped them on her trousers. Usually so composed and strong, but today- she just wanted to curl up in a ball in a dark room. Linda’s door swung open, with Linda as cheerful as ever and looking impeccably dressed. Considering, only a few hours ago Linda was up with Charlie, she could not believe how well Linda was handling motherhood, not that she thought she couldn’t cope. But Chloe remembered in the early days of Trixie, she was lucky if she even had time to brush her hair.

Linda’s brow furrowed as she caught a glimpse of Chloe on her doorstep. She knew within an instant, something was seriously wrong. Chloe was always smartly dressed, her hair done to perfection and always carrying herself with such confidence and purpose. But the woman on her doorstep, looked completely different. Her clothes were rumpled, and if Linda remembered correctly, they were the same clothes she had on yesterday. Although, her hair was up it was messy. Her skin looked pale, and her eyes looked painfully sore. This was not the Chloe she knew.

_“Chloe, come in. You don’t look very well. Do you want a coffee?”_

“ _Please.”_ Chloe replied, as she walked in and took a seat on a chair in the lounge. Linda returned a couple of minutes later with a steaming hot coffee. Chloe was relieved when she took a sip. She was tired, so tired. Although she knew the coffee wouldn’t help cure her emotional tiredness, it was a welcome moment to take a sip and hopefully it would help with the oncoming hangover she felt looming over her. Chloe looked up to see a worried Linda just staring at her, her face was speaking a thousand words. She looked worried, of course she would. Linda was a very good therapist, and right now, Chloe had a feeling she was easy to read.

 _“Charlie not here?”_ Chloe desperate to break the silence, without knowing quite what to say. She knew by Linda’s expression, she was not going to leave this house without admitting what happened last night. Without telling her that Lucifer was gone. Chloe was scared to say the words, for it all to become real. But perhaps Amenadiel could help bring him back? Surely that’s an option, she thought.

“ _Amenadiel has taken him for a walk.”_ Chloe nodded, faking a smile to Linda she knew was far from convincing.

Linda shuffled on the sofa to get nearer to Chloe, and grabbed her hand. She watched as Chloe brought her eyes up to Linda’s. She could see the pure hurt in her eyes. Linda had seen it countless times over the years in her work. That glazed over look, when the lights are on but no-one is home. To see it in Chloe’s eyes, when she was strong, independent and to be honest probably the only one on earth who could keep the devil in check. It worried her.

 _“What’s happened?”_ Linda broke the silence. Chloe looked down at their hands, taking a deep breath before exploding into a monologue of everything that happened. How she stood on the balcony, what Lucifer said about the prophecy, how she told him…finally that she loved him, and that now he was gone. That he had done it to protect them all. Chloe couldn’t control the tears that now ran down her face, and Linda, herself had to wipe a few stray tears off her cheek. Lucifer, was a good friend to her. He might be absolutely crazy, and he never did listen at sessions, but he was her friend nevertheless. Linda knew about Lucifer’s feelings for Chloe, probably better than Lucifer knew himself. He had spoken about her enough, but she never did doubt for a moment the love he had for her. Linda, was glad that Chloe had told him before he left. She couldn’t imagine the hurt Chloe was feeling, after all the years of uncertainty of what was going on with the two of them, and then all of a sudden for it to be thrown in the air, and crushed.

Linda’s front door swung open, making Chloe jump. Linda have her a reassuring squeeze of the hand, and they watched as Amenadiel strolled through the front door with Charlie, in the pushchair. “ _Hey! Well that worked, he’s fast asleep.”_ It wasn’t until Amenadiel had pushed the pushchair into the lounge, to see that Chloe was there, and the look on both the women’s faces. He rushed to Linda’s side, noticing Chloe wiping away the tears. “ _What’s going on?”_

Linda looked at Chloe, silently seeking permission to talk to him about it. Fully knowing, that Chloe could probably not stomach having to say it all over, again.

Amenadiel took a seat next to Linda, listening intently. Of course, he was sad his brother was gone. Their relationship had evolved over the last few years, they’d become closer. But, he was also proud of him. He had watched his brother grow. Watched him grow into a man who had learnt to love, and he was now sacrificing his time on Earth, for his nephew, for his family, for his friends and for Chloe.

Chloe had listened to it all, in silence, apart from the odd sniffle she tried to so desperately contain. _“You can bring him back though, right?”_ Her voice was pleading.

“ _It’s not that simple. The demons need a king.”_ Amenadiel, wished he could have given her some more positive response, but he would be lying. Chloe sighed, and cursed herself for even thinking he could come back. Amenadiel was right, he couldn’t come back. Not, with the chance that demons could destroy the world, putting every single one of them in danger.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you enjoyed this chapter (apologies it was so short) but longer chapters are coming!
> 
> Next chapter, Chloe welcomes back Trixie and returns to work at the Precinct.
> 
> And Trixie prays for the first time.


	3. I'll Never Love Again

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Chloe, is finally reunited with Trixie after saying goodbye to Lucifer. 
> 
> Chloe also returns to work- will it help?

**Chapter Three: I'll Never Love Again**

_I'll Never Love Again (Acoustic)- Kevin Simm_

The next couple of days passed in a bit of a blur. Chloe had asked Dan to have Trixie, blaming it on a stomach bug, and told the LAPD the same story. When in fact, she was just stuck on the sofa, aimlessly staring into space most of the time, the television acting as background noise, trying to fill in the silence. The days were spent going in and out of sleep, the emotions had drained every ounce of energy in her body. She received regular texts from Linda to make sure she was okay, every time Chloe would say she was fine. She was lying.

For the first time since he had been gone, Chloe had got showered and dressed. Dan was due to drop Trixie off at any moment and she wanted to at least appear that everything was fine in front of Trixie. Chloe was also set to return to work the following day too. She desperately needed the distraction of a case, something to throw her whole being into, instead of moping in front of the television. If he really was never going to come home, she couldn’t spend the rest of her life like this.

Chloe turned as she heard a knock at the door, before Trixie bounded in with Dan following closely behind her.

“ _MUMMY!”_ Her daughter ran into her arms, and Chloe held her tight. She forgot how good it felt to have her little girl in her arms.

 _“Are you feeling better?”_ Trixie asked, and Chloe managed to fix a smile on her face.

 _“Much better.”_ She placed a kiss on her forehead, _“How about you go and put your stuff in your room?”_ Trixie gave her Mum a smile, and headed to her room leaving Chloe with Dan.

“ _Are you okay? You look..”_

Chloe took a deep breath, while her fingers grasped at the bridge of her nose, trying so desperately to keep it together. “ _Lucifers’ gone.”_

Chloe watched as Dan’s body went rigid, and he couldn’t help but roll his eyes. “ _Of course he has… that bloody…”_

Chloe, could be angry at Dan’s response, but she didn’t have the energy. She put her hand on Dan’s arm, interjecting before he could go on a rant. “ _I know what you’re thinking Dan, but it’s not like that. It’s complicated. Family matters. He’s not coming back.”_

Dan could think of a lot of things he could say, but he bit his lip. Judging by Chloe’s face, she was not taking Lucifer’s departure well. She might be his ex-wife, but he still cared deeply for her. So he brought her close to him, engulfing her in a huge hug. He heard her sniffle into his shoulder. He knew too well she would be holding back the tears in front of him.

“ _Will you be ok for work tomorrow? I can ring…”_

Chloe straightened herself up, and wiped the few stray tears away from her face. “ _I’ll be fine, I need to get back.”_

Dan sadly smiled at her _“Well, just call if you need me.”_ Chloe smiled softly in response, before Dan said his goodbyes.

* * *

After Dan had left, Chloe and Trixie had shared a pizza. Being back with Trixie had helped. She had kept her mind occupied, even if just for a while. Chloe had listened as Trixie babbled excitedly about her weekend to the pier and the beach with her Dad, and filled in all about the school play they were rehearsing.

As the evening started to fall, and her and Trixie were cuddled up on the sofa, and watching ‘Beauty and the Beast’…. Again. Chloe found herself staring into space, she hadn’t noticed she was crying, not until Trixie had pointed it out.

 _“Mummy?”_ Trixie lightly nudged her Mother, watching as the tears flowed. “ _Are you okay?”_

Chloe, quickly snapped back to reality, watching as her daughters big brown eyes stared up to her. Filled with concern. Chloe quickly forced a fake smile on her face.

“ _Course I am, monkey.”_ She placed a kiss on her daughters forehead.

“ _Is it because Lucifer’s gone?”_

Chloe looked down at her daughter in shock and confusion. She wasn’t ready to tell Trixie yet.

“ _I heard you tell Daddy.”_

Chloe took a deep breath, she thought Trixie was far enough away in her room not to hear. She wanted to tell Trixie, she would soon have realised it herself. Not having Lucifer, just break into the house and start making breakfast. But it would seem her daughter had some seriously good hearing.

Chloe pulled her daughter in closer to her. Suddenly feeling guilty from keeping it away from her, even if it was just for a while. “ _I was going to tell you….”_

“ _I know, but he_ _will come back though, right Mummy?"_

 _“Maybe one day, babe.”_ Chloe didn’t like lying, and maybe she wasn’t lying- he could potentially one day, right? She needed to keep some sort of hope alive. Linda had said time moved differently down there, so maybe he’d get it sorted out in a couple of centuries or so, and by the time he came back to her and Trixie, not much time would have passed at all. She needed to have hope.

* * *

Trixie heard her Mum heard her mother’s footstep’s creep up the stairs. Trixie knew it was late, but she just wanted to try something. When she heard the distant sound of her Mum’s bedroom door shutting, she hopped out of bed, putting her knees on her fluffy pink rug, her elbows leaning on the bed and her hands in the prayer position.

“ _Hi Lucifer- It’s Trixie. I’m whispering so Mummy can’t hear me. She said you had to leave and go to see your family, but I’ve said that you will come back one day. I hope that made her feel less sad. Because even though, we had a nice evening, I could tell Mummy was really sad, she even started crying. And Mummy doesn’t cry, not really. And I guess it’s because you’re not here. She’s really going to miss you. Anyway, I’ve got to go to bed now. I have school in the morning. We’re practising the show, and I was going to ask Mummy if you could come, but I guess you won’t be able to come now. Night Lucifer.”_

* * *

Chloe had been laying in bed for hours now, it seemed whatever she tried she couldn’t sleep. It didn’t help that every time she shut her eyes, she could see his face, standing on the balcony- the sadness and hurt in his eyes, she would hear him say goodbye and then within a flash he was gone.

Chloe sat herself up in bed, she suddenly felt angry. Really. Fucking. Angry.

How dare God make him the King of Hell, to make him rule over Hell. He didn’t deserve that. His home was with her, not in some dark pit. Everyone had this horrendous imagine of the Devil. The evilest man you could ever imagine. Someone who killed and who tortured. But that wasn’t the Devil she knew. The one she knew was caring, thoughtful, funny. He’d bring her ridiculously specific tall no fat almond milk latte with sugar free caramel drizzle every single morning. He’d hold doors open for her, he’d sat playing Monopoly with a Unicorn on his cheek. He was the opposite of what they said he was. He was, well he was Lucifer and he was perfect. In his own Lucifer-y way.

Chloe’s skin was cold, yet she was sweating. She could feel the grief coursing through her veins. Trying to distract herself from another panic attack, she picked up her phone and put her music on shuffle. Her house seemed deathly quiet, and she needed to fill the void of silence.

‘ _I’ll Never Love Again’_ from the film, _A Star is Born_ came on. Typically, herself and Lucifer had watched it randomly one Saturday evening. With drugs, drink and music in it, Lucifer enjoyed it. But she never thought, this song would go onto have such meaning to her. The lyrics were really hitting home hard for her, and suddenly the idea to put music on, seemed a grave one, but she couldn’t turn it off.

As the music played, she pressed on her gallery on her phone. Suddenly regretting not taking any photographs of them both or just of Lucifer. Most of her gallery was filled with photographs of Trixie, or of Trixie’s work and drawings she had done. Chloe found a couple from their games night. Lucifer sporting his unicorn face paint, looking very unimpressed next to Trixie. Then one of the two of them, Trixie must have taken it. Both holding their bright pink lollipops. She noticed the look on her face in the photograph, looking at Lucifer and the huge grin on his face. No wonder Ella always went on about ‘Deckerstar’ by the look on her face, it couldn’t be more obvious. As she carried on scrolling she came across around ten selfies of Lucifer- she had never even spotted them before. She could make out it was at the Precinct. She could see herself doing some paperwork in the background. Chloe couldn’t help but let out a little laugh at her stern face in the background while Lucifer played silly buggers. It felt bittersweet, but she knew she would never delete these photographs, these were to be the only visual reminders of him.

The music continued, and Chloe brought the duvet cover to her chin, turning onto her side, one hand out of the covers with her phone as she scrolled through the rest of his ridiculous selfies.

_‘When we first met, I never thought that I would fall.’_

Chloe sniffled, the words were hitting new levels. She definitely did not think she would ever fall for him. With her eyes closed shut, she could basically play out the scene of their first meeting. She couldn’t deny, deep down she thought he was attractive. _‘I just like to play in general Detective, what about you?’_ Oh, how she just wanted to just punch him in the face that day. But, she couldn’t argue that they both had an instant connection, not that she would ever have admitted that, not till recently.

‘ _And I wanna pretend that it’s not true, oh baby- that you’re gone.’_

Oh how, she wished she could pretend that it wasn’t true, that he had just gone on a quick holiday, that she could pretend he was going to be back in a couple of weeks. In her heart she knew that wasn’t true. It broke her heart, trying to continue her life, when such a big character, such a big part of her life for the last few years, a person who she’d grown to love, had been savagely ripped away from her. Now she was left, with a Lucifer shaped hole in her life, and if she was honest, she didn’t know how she was going to make it through, without him. 

Chloe, did eventually fall asleep. The only light in the room, was from her phone. Lucifer’s smiling selfie lighting up the room.

* * *

The next day, felt like just a normal morning. Chloe had dropped Trixie off to school and headed straight to the Precinct. Part of her was glad to be back, her world had been turned upside down but the Precinct was familiar. As she walked down the stairs she received a few sympathetic nods from the other Detectives and Officers as she headed to her desk. The news of Lucifer’s sudden departure obviously had spread.

Chloe sat down at her desk, browsing some of the paperwork in front of her-nothing too taxing. A few murders on drug dealers, but that was nothing new and they appeared to be open and shut cases. She had to admit, being back at work did distract her from her grief for a little while. Although, she was used to the presence of Lucifer beside her. Not that he was ever very helpful when paperwork was involved, but she had grown used to him sitting beside her. The odd whiff of his aftershave, his feet on her desk as he played games on his phone, or the chuckle he would do when he was exchanging silly videos with Ella. It was a lot quieter without him, and Chloe didn’t like it.

It was now just after lunch, and Chloe decided to give Ella a visit. Heading into the Forensic Lab, Ella had her headphones in, she was in her own little world singing along to a song Chloe had never heard before, but then again her music knowledge didn’t extend much past the 90’s. Ella, soon noticed Chloe’s hand on the desk and whipped off her headphones, giving Chloe her signature cheesy grin.

 _“Sorry Chlo, didn’t hear you come in.”_ Ella engulfed her into a hug. _“Good to have you back, girl. Have you heard from Lucifer yet? I can’t believe he just took off like that I mean….”_

Chloe gulped. Hearing someone else say his name, turned her blood cold. Chloe suddenly couldn’t even speak, it was like her brain had stopped functioning. She gripped onto the desk till her knuckles were white, trying to keep herself upright.

Ella felt like she was saved, when Dan walked through the door. He noticed Chloe was holding onto the desk, with deep shallow breathes. Dan frowned at Ella, who just shrugged her shoulders and mouthed ‘Lucifer’.

“ _Chlo, I’m so sorry I shouldn’t have said…”_

Now with Dan and Ella on either side of her, she felt slightly embarrassed at the fact she had nearly had a full-on panic attack at just the mention of his name.

 _“Why don’t you go home? I don’t know if you’re ready….”_ Dan said, with his hand protectively on Chloe’s shoulder.

Chloe stood upright, interrupting Dan before he could say anymore. _“No.”_ She said more sternly than she intended to. “ _No, sorry. I… I’m fine. I need to be here.”_

Chloe put on a smile, straightening herself out, before heading out the door.

Dan and Ella stood in the forensic lab, a bit dazed at what just happened. _“Man, I only mentioned his name, and she nearly passed out.”_

Dan ran his fingers through his hair, he had never seen Chloe like this before. Chloe was probably the strongest woman he’d come across, he had known her for so many years, and not once had he seen her like this. He didn’t know what to do, he didn’t know how to help.

 _“I’m going to bloody kill him if he ever comes back…”_ Dan was fuming with Lucifer, after everything he’d upped and left Chloe and not for the first time either.

“ _I’m going to text him, this isn’t cool.”_ Ella whipped out her phone, and began typing.

Dan just shrugged “ _I’ve already tried it, no response.”_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so, so much for reading! :) 
> 
> Your Kudos and Comments are soooo appreciated.
> 
> I hope you enjoyed this chapter, onto the next one! Trixie has a few surprises in store for her Mum.


	4. Wherever You Will Go

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In this chapter, Trixie has a few surprises in store for Chloe.
> 
> Thanks again for all of you reading this <3 :)

**Chapter Four: Wherever You Will Go**

_Wherever You Will Go- The Calling_

Eight weeks had now passed since Lucifer's departure. Life was carrying on without him and Chloe didn't know if that was a good thing or not. Herself and Trixie found themselves going back to their normal routine of school, work and homework. 

Chloe, also had a new routine for herself. The nights Trixie was with Dan. She'd cry, let all the tears flow. However, on the nights she had Trixie, she made sure to hold the tears in, even if she was alone in her room. She was so paranoid Trixie would hear here. She needed to be strong, for her daughter. 

Chloe thought, as time moved on that things might get a little easier, but that wasn't the case. if anything, she was starting to feel worse.

Dan had started commenting on her weight loss, her jeans were now way too big, and her jumpers just hanging off her. When she thought about it, she was quite certain she had not had a full meal since he had been gone. She had tried, but she just couldn't physically get through more than a few mouthfuls. 

People at work had commented on her appearance, mostly on the fact that she looked permanently tired, and she was. Most of her nights were spent looking up at the ceiling, replaying every moment with Lucifer. Going over every word she ever said, going through everything she wish she had said, and wishing she could take back all their arguments and disagreements. There was so much she wished she had done differently. She wished she had believed him, wish she had accepted he was the Devil years earlier. She wished she never let Pierce into her life. And she wished, she had not been so bloody stubborn and took the jump and told him her feelings sooner, then perhaps, just perhaps they might not have been in this mess.

As she stood at her kitchen counter, staring into space, she wondered how long it had been for Lucifer now. It had been eight weeks for her, but it could have been hundreds of years for him. She wondered if he still thought of her. Did he even remember her? Did he miss her, as much as he missed him?

_"Mummy, have you heard anything I've just said?"_

Chloe shook her head, bringing herself out of her trance, and back onto her daughter, whose big brown eyes were staring up at her.

" _Sorry babe, I was... distracted."_

Trixie scoffed. " _You keep doing that Mum."_

Chloe rubbed her eyes with her hands. She really did need to snap out of this, she needed to get out of this hole of grief she found herself in. She needed to deal with it, to be there for Trixie and to be a proper Mum again.

" _I'm sorry monkey, it's just that..."_

" _You're struggling that Lucifer's gone, right?"_ Chloe marvelled at how intelligent her daughter was, not just academically but she had an incredible skill of reading people, she always knew when people were sad or happy. She just had a natural knack for it, wise beyond her years. Chloe could only manage a nod back.

" _Well if it makes you feel better, I spoke to him last night. Well... he spoke to me. He says he misses you very much."_

Chloe felt like her jaw hit the fall. " _What do you mean, he spoke to you, Trix?"_

" _Oh, I pray to him every night. Sometimes he speaks to me, when I'm asleep. I can hear him."_ Chloe walked around the kitchen island, now standing in front of her daughter, bending down slightly to her eye level. Trixie was so nonchalant about it all, like this was normal. Is it normal? or was Trixie just having some odd dreams?

Trixie shrugged. _"I dunno Mum, but he answers my questions sometimes, so I guess it's him."_

Chloe closed her eyes, breathing in through her nose and out through her mouth. Desperately trying to gain some form of composure. This was massive. If Trixie could speak to him, did that mean she could too?

_"Mummy, are you okay? I didn't mean to make you sad."_ Chloe noticed the worried look in her daughters eyes, all she could do was bring her in for a massive cuddle.

" _You didn't make me sad at all baby."_ Chloe leant back from the hug, placing her hands on Trixie's shoulders. " _Do you think tonight, you could pray to him again tonight? We need to check this is real. Ask him...."_ Chloe racked her brain for questions, that only Lucifer would know the answer to. " _Ask him, what was the song he played at prom?"_

Trixie scrunched up her nose in confusion " _At prom?"_

Chloe smiled at the memory. " _Yeah, ask him which song he played at our prom, he'll understand."_

Trixie smiled, before heading to her bedroom to collect her school bag for the day.

* * *

Chloe and Trixie sat in her car on the way to school.

_"Can I put a song on?"_ Trixie asked, and Chloe responded with a nod. Trixie reached for her Mum's phone, which was connected to the Bluetooth of the car.

As the song began to play, Chloe smiled. Not quite a 90s jam, but an early noughties one, and also one of her favourites from back in the day. A bit of a random song choice from Trixie, she thought. She was usually one to put on the latest chart hits, and usually stayed well away from her Mum's playlist.

Trixie returned the phone to the centre console of the car. _"I forgot, Lucifer asked me to play this song for you."_

It all went quiet in the car, while Chloe became captivated by the lyrics.

_"And maybe, I'll find out. A way to make it back someday,_

_Well then I hope there's someone out there, who can bring me back to you,_

_If I could, then I would. I'll go wherever you will go."_

Lucifer, was always better at telling his feelings through music. Then there she was, driving through the streets of LA, and crying...again. But they weren't necessarily sad tears this time. Trixie grabbed her mother's hand and Chloe smiled softly in response. Chloe knew, that Trixie perfectly understood what Lucifer meant by playing this song. As Chloe parked the car, she gave Trixie a quick hug.

_"He'll come back home one day, I know he will."_ And with that, Trixie jumped out the door, giving her Mum a wave before running into the school building. Chloe's heart could burst. She knew, she hadn't been a very good Mum the last two months. She had been distracted, consumed by sadness and guilt, yet Trixie had understood, and always knew when she needed a hug. Chloe felt blessed to have her.

Chloe held onto the steering wheel, holding back from any more tears falling. She looked up at the sky, secretly hoping that God would somehow realise his son was a good man, relieve him of duties in Hell, and send him back to her.

She began to make her way to work, sticking the song on repeat.

* * *

Another day almost over, Chloe had said goodnight to Trixie and left her to pray to Lucifer in privacy, as she had asked. Chloe so desperately wanted to hear what Trixie was saying, but she respected her privacy so headed up to her room.

Trixie, did her nightly routine. Waiting till she heard her Mum's bedroom door close, before leaning on her pink fluffy rug, her hands clasped together. She squeezed her eyes and began to pray.

_"Hey Lucifer. It's me...Trixie. I told Mummy you've spoken to me a few times. I didn't say before, I was too scared, scared she'd think I was just being silly, but I think she believes me. She wants me to ask you something, to prove it's real. She said to ask you, what is the song you played at prom? Whatever that means. I put that song n you asked me to. I think she liked it. She cried, but I think it was happy tears. I'm doing as you ask though, I'm taking good care of her, and I always give her an extra big cuddle when I think she's super sad. Anyway, I better go to sleep. Night, Lucifer._

* * *

It was becoming easier for Lucifer to keep track of time on Earth now. He would always hear from Trixie, what he assumed to be every night. Considering his previous views on children, hearing from Trixie had began to be his favourite time in Hell.

_"What is the song you played at Prom?"_

Lucifer smiled at the memory. Chloe in her dusty pink jumper, standing in front of him.

" _Detective, will you go to the prom with me?"_ He had asked, before taking her hand, and leading her to the dancefloor of LUX. Yazoo's, only you on the sound system. He'd always kick himself, for not kissing her in that moment.

Then he remembers the words she had said that night: _"It's better to move forward than to be stuck in the past."_

Those words didn't ring true right now. Being stuck in the past for him now, meant being stuck with the memories of his time with Chloe. That is all he needed, to get him through each hour, each day, each century. The memories of her face, her infectious laugh and those eyerolls were seared into his memory. Although, he had the painstaking revelation that maybe for her, it would perhaps be better for her to move on. He knew, deep down that she would need to at some point. But the thought of her, being someone else's instinctively turned his eyes red.

Lucifer paced around the corridors of Hell. Thinking of his response back to the urchin. It was clear, that somehow, she was hearing him. He didn't know why or how. Usually prayers to celestials only worked one way. He had never even attempted to pray to Chloe, he could hardly bring himself to say her name out loud, let alone to tell her everything that was going on his head. If he truly never was coming back, speaking to her would not help her eventually move on. She did not deserve to be pining over a man that would never be returning to her, and could never give her what she deserved. But she had asked for something, and coming through Trixie he felt he had to oblige.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you all enjoyed this chapter! :) 
> 
> Thank you so much for your kudos, comments, subscriptions and bookmarkings so far!!
> 
> The next chapter is a pretty long one- we find out if Lucifer replied to Trixie and we also have a 'tribe' night out!
> 
> I have a few ideas for this story- but if you talented lot have any ideas, tips or any comments at all, I would love to hear them.
> 
> <3


	5. Need You Now

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This chapter, we see more prayers, an important reply and a 'Tribe' Night Out!
> 
> I promise, the angst is almost over, and it is nearly time for our Deckerstar team to be reunited. However, there's some important events still to come.
> 
> Hope you enjoy this chapter! :)

**Chapter Five: Need You Now**

_Need You Now- Lady Antebellum_

The next morning, Trixie was sat at the breakfast bar while her Mum finished off cooking the waffles. Chloe placed them in front of her daughter, topped with fruit. It was a school day after all. She couldn’t send her daughter to school on a sugar high, that she would have got from the copious amount of chocolate sauce Trixie usually chose to top her waffles with at a weekend. Chloe sat opposite her, they ate, they small talked. After a brief amount of silence, Trixie was staring into space.

_“Yazoo”_

Chloe stopped eating immediately. ” _Huh?”_

 _“Yazoo, that’s what Lucifer told me last night. I’ve just remembered.”_ Chloe was dumbfounded, the praying had worked, Lucifer could speak to Trixie they were communicating through prayer or somehow.

“ _Only you. Is that the song?”_ Chloe nodded back to her daughter.

“ _Cool! I can pray to Lucifer.”_ Chloe smiled at her daughter, seeing the joy on her face, she was able to speak to definitely one of her top three people in her life. “ _Mummy, that means… you might be able to speak to him too.”_

 _“Maybe monkey.”_ Chloe thought about it for a moment. This could change everything. She could potentially speak to him, it could be like phone calls but all in her head. She wondered, if that would be a good thing at all. Of course, she wanted to speak to him more than anything in the world, but if communication could be open between them both, that could lead to just more heartbreak. It would be like he was right there, yet just out of her grasp.

 _“Did he say anything else?”_ Chloe asked.

Trixie sat there, racking her brain trying to remember Lucifer’s words. It wasn’t always easy, like waking up and trying to remember a dream. But then it came to her. _“He said, he said…”_ Trixie’s face dropped, remembering Lucifer’s words, remembering how he said them. _“He was sorry. For screwing things up with you.”_ Trixie had never heard him sound sad. “ _He said something about Candy, something to do with Vegas. and Pierce.”_

Chloe gulped. She hadn’t held any grudges with Lucifer, she never would. She knew he had his reasons, for everything he had done. Usually with good intentions, that had never quite worked out the way he would have hoped. But she knew his intentions were always good. What killed her inside, was thinking of him, all alone in hell and thinking of all his ‘mistakes’. She needed to reach him, she needed to tell him, he had no reason to be sorry. If anyone should be sorry, it should be her. For all the things with Father Kinley, for not taking his metaphors as truth earlier and for running when she had always given him the impression she would not. She kicked herself, for all the missed moments with him, for all those missed years, when they could have been something.

Trixie grabbed her Mum’s hand. Chloe looked up from her breakfast at her daughter. The most understanding, mature little girl she had ever known. It was like she always knew what Chloe was thinking, she always knew the right time to give her a hug. Chloe felt guilty though, it should be the other way around, but lately it felt like Trixie was taking more care of her than the other way around.

“ _I think you should try praying to Lucifer tonight Mummy… It might work.”_

Chloe nodded. “ _Yeah, perhaps I’ll give it a try.”_

* * *

Chloe had asked Trixie all the details on how she prayed, wanting to give herself every opportunity to get through to him, it appeared that you’d have to always start the prayer with Lucifer’s name and Trixie had only so-far managed to get a reply when she was asleep.. So there she was in her bedroom, knees on the floor, hands together with her elbows resting on the bed. She felt a little bit ridiculous, but it was worth a shot.

“ _Lucifer…Lucifer, it’s Chloe. I don’t really know what I’m doing, but Trixie said she prays to you every night and you’ve replied a couple of times. Perhaps it’s all a coincidence, but I had to give it a try. Trixie said that you were sorry, sorry about Candy and what all happened with Pierce. I want you to know, you have no reason to be sorry.”_ Chloe took a deep breath and laughed nervously. _“I spend all my time, thinking of you, thinking of what I would say to you and now…. I’ve forgotten it all. I just don’t think words can do justice of how much I miss you and how much Trixie misses you too._ ” Chloe took a moment, biting her lip to try and hold back the tears. She didn’t want him to know how much she was struggling just to hold it together. “ _I just cling onto the hope, that one day, I will see you again.”_

Then Chloe stopped, she couldn’t say anymore. She slumped onto her bed. Beginning her nightly routine. The music was on, his smiling face lighting up her dark room. This was the closest she could get to him.

* * *

The next morning, Chloe walked down the stairs and headed straight for the coffee machine, as she did every morning. Trixie came bounding out of her room and over to the breakfast bar.

_“So did you do it Mummy? Did he reply?”_

It took Chloe a moment to realise what on earth her child was talking about. _“I did, but I don’t remember anything.”_ Chloe desperately racked her brain, trying to grasp onto anything, any memory of Lucifer speaking to her last night. As that seems to be how it worked with Trixie, he’d only respond when she was asleep. But Chloe’s mind was blank…nothing.

_“Well maybe it’ll come back to you later, or maybe he was just busy…”_

Chloe loved her daughters optimism, but as Chloe took a sip of her coffee she started thinking maybe it had been a bad idea for her to pray to Lucifer, she couldn’t quite shift the feeling of disappointment that he hadn’t responded to her.

* * *

The week went on, and still no response from Lucifer to Chloe. She already felt set back emotionally but with no response this had caused her to fly even further into the pit of grief and depression.

So, with Trixie at Dan’s and after countless debates in the ‘Tribe’ WhatsApp group, they’d decided on a night out. Ella had accidently suggested LUX, and after Linda and Maze’s suggestion that they probably should go somewhere else. Chloe decided LUX was just fine. It was the best place in the city anyway, and she couldn’t avoid the place forever.

Chloe had decided to make a bit of an effort for her rare night out. It wasn’t often she got dressed up anyway, but since Lucifer had been gone, if she wasn’t in work clothes, she was spending most of her time in her pyjamas.

Chloe had opted for a dark red dress, simple but one of Chloe’s favourites, not that she could remember the last time she had, had the occasion to wear it. As she took one final look in the mirror, she shuffled her hair slightly and smiled at herself. It was nice to see herself looking a bit more presentable, even if she was a bit thinner these days. Hearing the beep of the Uber outside, she grabbed her keys off the side, picked up her bag and headed out.

As the taxi pulled up outside LUX, she could see the bright lights of the club illuminating what felt the whole street. She felt an overwhelming sense of nausea. It suddenly dawned on her, she hadn’t been back to LUX, not since the night they had said goodbye. Part of her, began to think this was a dreadful idea and she was tempted to ask the driver to return her straight home. But Chloe didn’t have time to hold onto that thought, because as soon as her foot hit the pavement, she heard Ella’s excitable screams. _“CHLO!”_ Ella was waving frantically, standing by Linda at the door of the club. The bouncers let them in with a curt nod, most of the staff knew her by now, always letting her skip straight to the front of the queue, much to the annoyance of other patrons.

As they entered LUX, everything was exactly how it always has been. The music was pounding and the place was rammed like it always been, on any other Saturday night when Lucifer was in charge. It was like he had never left. All these people, carrying on with their lives, partying in his club like had never left. Chloe wasn’t sure if it made her sad, or it was comforting. She knew she was here to enjoy herself, it was her one night to let her hair down and have fun. They made a bee line for the bar, spotting Maze behind it.

 _“You’re working?”_ Linda asked confused.

Maze casually jumped up and slid her body over the bar. “ _Not now. Now are we going to get drunk or what?”_ They all smiled and nodded. “ _Patrick!”_ She called with her arm up “ _8 shots of Tequila.”_

Chloe knew then, this night was going to go one of two ways. A good distraction or a fucking disaster.

A couple of hours had passed, and they were all pretty drunk by this point, well apart from Maze. As they sat in a booth, surrounded by drinks, thanks to having Maze there were coming in thick and fast, there was not one moment any of them had an empty glass in front of them. They had all consciously not brought up Lucifer. Linda had spoken about Charlie, filling them all in about the sleepless nights and his latest milestones. Ella, had spoken about her disastrous dating life and Maze- was well, Maze.

Now, they were all back on the dancefloor and were in hysterics over Maze’s horrendously awkward dancing. Chloe had to admit, this had really helped her get out of her dark hole.

It wasn’t until she turned around, seeing the crowd. She stopped it. The Piano. It stood, where it always had done, she blinked and when she opened her eyes, she could see Lucifer sitting there. A glass of whisky on the top, taking a sip every so often. His large hands, smoothly playing across the keys effortlessly. He was right in front of her eyes, and as he looked up from his glass he shot her his handsome smile, the one he saved only for her. She started to make her way towards him. But she felt a tugging on her arm, turning around it was Linda.

“ _ARE…ARE YOU OKAY?”_ Linda just about could say, while continuing to take another sip of her cocktail. When Chloe turned her head from Linda and back to the piano, he was gone. She took a deep breath and gave Linda a reassuring smile. _“Yeah fine… I just thought, I just thought I saw him.”_

Linda put a reassuring hand on Chloe’s hand. _“That’s very normal. You miss him. We all miss him.”_ Before Chloe could even manage to reply. Maze had dragged her into the middle of them and poured a shot of vodka straight from the bottle into her mouth. Much to the delight of the LUX crowd and laughter from the other Tribe members.

They were back in the booth, Linda was struggling with sore feet in her heels. They were now listening to Ella, and what felt was like unsuccessful story date number 354. Ella really needed to stop going for bad guys, Linda and Chloe tried to the voices of reason, but Maze was acting like the little devil on Ella’s shoulder and was relishing in all the details, especially the naughty ones.

“ _Did I… Did I tell you girls that Trey had a tattooed….”_

At this point, Chloe needed to get up. She excused herself to go to the toilet. As she looked in the mirror as she washed her hands. She got the feeling of guilt back. This time, she felt guilty for having a little bit of fun tonight. She knew it was stupid. Lucifer would want her to have a good time. But she couldn’t help but feel that awful ache in her heart. As she walked out of the bathrooms, she spotted the ‘Tribe’ but instead of heading back over to them, she decided to get in the elevator. Pressing in the digits to allow her in. (since Lucifer had finally installed security) and she headed up to the penthouse.

This was the first time she had seen the penthouse, since the morning she left after he had gone. A lump formed in her throat as she saw the white sheets placed over everything. The dreadful memory resurfaced of when he had left for Vegas. Accept, this time she should have expected it, but for some reason she hadn’t. It was like a tiny piece of her was hoping, he’d be standing there, he’d turn around with hand in his pocket, and his other hand nursing a drink. She’d see those deep brown eyes and a smirk develop on his lips. He’d say _‘Well hello, Detective. What do I owe this pleasure?”_ But it was just all a fantasy. Instead, everything was covered. It felt cold and empty. She ran her hand over the white sheet covering the piano as she headed to the balcony.

Standing on the balcony, on the same spot Lucifer had been standing on, she closed her eyes. Chloe hated this balcony and the memories attached to it. Then again, she loved it too. You could see so much of LA- even at night, you could see the expanse of lights, the distant sound of the people below, the noise of the cars. It was beautiful. With her eyes closed, she imaged she was with Lucifer again, leaning in on his shoulder. Able to smell his aftershave and she’d regained the one thing she missed most, just the presence of him beside her.

“ _Lucifer. I don’t know if you can hear me. I’m standing on your balcony. Where we said goodbye and…”_ she began to cry. “ _Fuck, I miss you so much it hurts.”_ She laid her hand on the barrier of the balcony. Before feeling an arm wrap around her shoulders. Oh, how she wished it was Lucifer’s but she knew it wasn’t.

“ _Oh Chlo, we miss him too.”_ Linda kept her arm around Chloe. “ _C’mon, come sit down.”_ Linda led Chloe to a seat on the balcony. Maze put a glass of whiskey in front of her, before joining the rest of the ladies around a table on the balcony.

Chloe decided to tell them about the praying, well more like Trixie’s ability to pray to him anyway. “ _But I prayed, and nothing- I got nothing back.”_

Linda held Chloe’s hand, in fact she hadn’t really let go since they sat down. “ _You know, Lucifer’s not the best at conveying his emotions.”_

The tribe let out a little giggle, and even Chloe smiled a little- it was true, he never was the best.

 _“He fucking loves you man.”_ Ella chimed in.

Chloe took a sip of her drink, not that she needed anymore alcohol. Linda squeezed her hand, for extra support. She knew what a tough time Chloe was having, and she knew Lucifer very well, she knew he would just be brooding, waiting to find the right words.

“ _All this lovey dovey stuff just makes me want to drink.”_ Maze left and walked inside up to the bar.

They shared a little smile with each other- good ol’ Maze.

* * *

After another hour or so with the ladies, Chloe eventually made it home. Maze said she could sleep at the Penthouse, since she was just watching over it. Although Chloe wanted to, it would do her no good. So as she walked into her home, she grabbed a huge glass of water before downing two paracetamol and heading to bed. She’d had fun, but after copious amounts of alcohol and with all the emotions that had begun to surface she was tired. She climbed into bed, and for the first time since he’d gone, she fell asleep straight away.

* * *

Centuries had passed now. With everything in some sort of control again, Lucifer had managed to create his own version of home. His own, LUX in Hell. Complete with a bar, piano and balcony. It wasn’t quite the same as the real LUX. There was no summer LA breeze floating through from the balcony, and the whisky tasted like water. But it was as close as he could get to the real thing.

As he stood over the balcony, he looked over LA- although of course, it wasn’t really LA. Just a backdrop he had created from his memories.

He had heard Chloe pray to him the other way, well in fact it had been a year or so for him now. Although, he hazarded a guess it hadn’t been that long for her. Trixie had told him, her mother had seemed a bit upset that he had not replied. Truthfully, he wanted to reply, he wanted nothing more than to talk to her, but he just couldn’t find the right words.

As he took a sip of whisky, his elbows leaning on the balcony rail. He felt the familiar buzz in his spine, another prayer.

“ _I’m standing on your balcony. Where we said goodbye….”_

It was her.

Little did she know, she was mirroring exactly what he was doing at that same precise moment. He bit his lip, he wanted so much, to be back home with her. Hearing her voice, through the tears broke his heart. He missed her, just as much as she missed him. He’d endured it now for thousands of years. It had been all that time since he’d last seen her, last heard her voice, seen her smile and kissed her lips.

Fuck.

Time passed, and as he laid on his bed, staring at the ceiling he finally found the courage to speak to her.

“ _Detec…”_ He quickly stopped himself, this was no times for nicknames. _“Chloe. I’m sorry I never spoke to you sooner. I just wanted to be able to gather my thoughts, to reply to you properly. Turns out I can’t. I’m not always the best at telling anyone how I feel. But I miss you, terribly so.”_ He took a moment, just to catch his breath, trying to recoup as he laid their on the verge of tears. Chloe was obviously upset already, and if he was crying too, that would only upset her further or cause her to worry. “ _I hope you know, I’ll always be trying to get back to you.”_ He realised his voice was giving away more than he hoped, his voice cracking as he desperately held in the tears. “ _It has been thousands of years for me now. But I hope one day, I will get back you. And I hope I’ll be able to deliver that chocolate cake that Trixie prays for every night. It was always you, Chloe.”_

With that, he stopped. He couldn’t carry on. The tears had escaped. He cursed himself, for being weak. Here he was, The King of Hell, crying over a human. What would the Demons make of that?

He rolled over onto his side, and closed his eyes. He was thankful for his celestial memory. He could easily remember the Detective’s face. There he pictured her, laying next to him, both facing each other. He smiled softly at the fantasy. She was wearing one of his white shirts, like she had done when he returned from Vegas. Her golden hair splayed across his pillows as the golden LA sun rises and begins to light up her face. She sleepily opens her eyes, and he’s met by the eyes he had found himself lost in, so many times. He leans in, kissing her softly. “ _Well, Good Morning Detective.”_

But then, he opens his eyes and she is gone. Just a fragment of his imagination.

* * *

Chloe awoke the next morning, feeling grateful for the paracetamol she took before heading to bed. Apart from a tiny headache, and just feeling a little tired the hangover was bearable. She checked her phone: **8:03am.** She let out a sigh, wishing her body had let her sleep a bit longer on her day off. It’s not like she had anywhere to be. She had a couple of messages. One from Ella and one from Linda, just checking in, to see if she was okay. Halfway through replying to Linda, she dropped her phone on the bed.

Shit.

She remembered.

He had spoken to her.

She quickly, picked up her phone again, and dialled Linda.

“ _Chlo, everything ok? How you feeling? Because this headache I have is a killer.”_

“ _He replied, he spoke to me.”_

There was a moment of silence, Linda taking a minute to understanding what Chloe was talking about, before remembering the conversation they had, had last night.

“ _Oh my god, what…what did he say?”_

It wasn’t entirely clear in her mind just yet, but then it came to her.

_“Something about he wanted to reply sooner, but wanted to reply properly, and he isn’t good at explaining feelings.”_

_“Told you!”_ Linda replied, and Chloe let out a chuckle.

“ _And that he misses me, and he’s trying to get back and something about getting Trixie chocolate cake.”_

The giggled at that, they shared their excitement on what this meant for Chloe. She could finally speak to Lucifer, even if he was in the depths of Hell. But deep down Chloe had doubts if this was a good thing. She was barely hanging on emotionally as it was, but being able to speak to him- knowing she might not actually ever see him again, could be worse.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks again lovely readers! :)
> 
> Next chapter, we head six months on (and I promise, things are happier!)
> 
> There's a party, and Lucifer has a few surprises up his sleeve for his Decker girls.


	6. Love Is All Around

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A happier chapter for you all! :) 
> 
> And we move six months on from the last chapter, so Lucifer has been away for 8 months!
> 
> It's Chloe's Birthday & Lucifer has some surprises.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> want to thank you all again for all of your comments, kudos etc! 
> 
> I was so nervous posting- but you lovely readers have made me feel glad I did.
> 
> I hope you enjoy this chapter <3

**Chapter Six: Love Is All Around**

_Love Is All Around- Wet Wet Wet_

Six Months Later

It had now been eight months since Lucifer's departure. Chloe was better. There was no denying, she still really missed Lucifer. Hardly a second passed where he was not on her mind. But, she was back to enjoying life, finding the beauty in things once again. Work was going well too. Her new partner was Dan, and their closure rate was good. Not 'Deckerstar' good, but still one of the highest in the Precinct regardless. Life was better, and Chloe was smiling again.

Chloe awoke to an excited Trixie jumping on her bed, a handmade card in her hand. " _HAPPY BIRTHDAY MUM!"_

Chloe smiled, thanking her daughter and kissing her forehead as she settled into her side. Chloe looked at the card, making out four people on the beach. " _Whose this supposed to be?"_

Trixie grinned, clearly proud of her artwork. She pointed at each individual person. " _Well that's me....obviously. That's you, that's Daddy and that's Lucifer."_ Chloe let out a little giggle, noticing a small Devil's tail drawn out of Lucifer's suit. 

" _Thank you, Monkey. It's perfect."_

Trixie was beaming from ear to ear, she ran out of her bedroom and returned with some presents that her Dad had helped her buy. Chloe was thrilled, with her new '#1 Mum' Mug (one that was the exact replica of Dan's one, Trixie wanted them to match at work) alongside a personalised frame, with a picture of the both of them from a recent trip to the beach and some fluffy socks.

After half an hour or so, lounging in bed, giggling and talking in bed with her daughter, Chloe decided her morning coffee was well overdue. Trixie jumped off the bed and started heading down the stairs ahead of her Mum.

" _I am soooo excited for your party."_

Chloe followed her daughter down the stairs, she scoffed. " _Trix, its not really a party. It's just a few people coming over for Pizza."_

Trixie, just laughed in response. " _That's what you think."_ Trixie had reached the end of the stairs and disappeared into the lounge, leaving a confused Chloe behind her.

Chloe sipped her coffee as she began to open some cards, one from her Mother. One from her Aunt Tina, who she hadn't seen since she was about sixteen years old but always send birthday cards, and cards for every seasonal occasion known to man. Alongside, a card from Dan.

_To Chlo,_

_HAPPY BIRTHDAY!_

_I know this year has been tough, but you have been so strong. We are all so proud of you. Thank you for being the best mother to our little monkey._

_Hope you enjoy your party!_

_Love,_

_Dan xx_

Chloe smiled, putting the card on the side to join the others. But what was it with everyone calling it a party. Chloe, never did quite like being the centre of attention, therefore just a pizza with Maze, Ella, Linda, Amenadiel and Dan seemed a nice quiet option. 

She felt so thankful to Dan for the last eight months. He had been a rock for her. He'd stepped up massively, going above and beyond to help with Trixie when she felt too depressed. He always checked in with her, he'd bring her coffee every morning even if it wasn't her tall non-fat almond milk latter with low-fat caramel drizzle, but the thought was there. 

* * *

It was midday. Chloe and Trixie had spent the morning lounging on the sofa, watching trash television. Trixie had retreated to her room, about twenty minutes previously. Chloe could hear the opening and shutting of cupboard doors and general noise, but thought nothing of it. Before, the door swung open and she turned to see Trixie come out of her room, all dressed up. She was wearing her best dress, a navy floral one she had worn a couple of months ago to a wedding on Dan's side of the family.

" _Babe, you look lovely. But no-one's coming round till 6 and we are only having pizza."_

Trixie rolled her eyes, and Chloe could not stop her lips forming a smile, knowing full well who she had learnt that from. 

" _You better get ready, we're being collected in half an hour."_ Trixie grabbed her Mum's hand and began pulling her up. She forced her Mum up the stairs with strict instructions to wear 'something nice, but not too nice, not like a ball gown.' So reading through the lines, Chloe decided to put on her best jeans, and her favourite dark red blouse that she had not had the occasion to wear it for, in so long. It was nearing summer, so there was no need for a jacket and she opted to have her hair down. 

She heard a few beeps of a car horn outside, and Trixie called from the bottom of the stairs. " _MUMMY! He's here, it's time to go. We need to go."_

Chloe had no idea what was happening, but grabbed a few bits of her bed, shoving them in her handbag and heading down the stairs.

She locked the door behind her, and spotted Dan's car. He wasn't alone. There was Ella in the backseat, waving frantically as she approached the car. Trixie opened the back door of her Dad's car to join Ella.

" _You can go in the front Mummy, as it's your birthday."_

Chloe smiled, and jumped into the front. Saying thank-you to the 'Happy Birthday' cheers from both Ella and Dan.

" _Is anyone going to tell me what's going on?"_ Chloe said seriously, after Dan had been driving for ten minutes or so. She had never been one for surprises, they made her nervous.

" _You'll see"_ Dan replied. Chloe noticing the little smirk on his face. She then turned to look behind her, to just see both Ella and Trixie with huge cheesy grins plastered over their faces. 

Dan parked up the car. Chloe saw the sign: 'Vista Hermosa Natural Park.' She had been here a few times, mostly when she was on maternity leave with Trixie. She'd spend hours just walking around, with a baby Trixie in her pushchair. 

Chloe got out the car hesitantly. Not knowing, really why on Earth, Dan would bring her here? Dan and Ella began walking in front with purpose. Chloe followed them, with Trixie's hand in hers.

They headed over to the large green. Chloe noticed a big white gazebo. She looked down at Trixie who just gave her a mischievous smile, she couldn't help but notice as she got closer there were balloons and a big banner clearly reading:

**'HAPPY BIRTHDAY, DETECTIVE'**

Her heart skipped a little bit at the word Detective.' Of course, she got called it at work, all the time. Yet, every time she would get a little ache in her heart. She realised, when she had read the banner in his voice. 

She noticed, that there was Amenadiel, Maze and Linda sat there with Charlie on a picnic rug.

" _HAPPY BIRTHDAY!"_ they cheered in unison. Chloe was dumbfounded. If anyone deserved anything like this, it was all of them for getting her through the last eight months, not her. She felt that sudden tingly rush of love all over her body. She truly, did have the best friends in the world.

Her favourite 90s jams were playing on a small speaker. She noticed a table in the gazebo filled with all her favourite foods, including Lemon bars. It was perfect.

As she sat on the picnic blanket, a glass of Prosecco in hand. She watched as Trixie played with Charlie who was now belly laughing at Trixie's great skill of making funny faces. Maze stood in the corner of the gazebo cutting a lemon bar with her knife before eating it. Because, obviously just shoving it in was against Maze's rules... knifes always needed to be used. Dan and Ella, sat beside each other on the rug laughing and Amenadiel looked on at them all thoughtfully. 

" _PRESENTS!!!!"_ Trixie shouted, nearly loud enough for the whole of LA to hear as she brought a small collection of presents from one of the tables in the gazebo out to Chloe.

Chloe opened up her presents from Maze. Not surprise, they were a pair of knives. She would definitely have to keep them out of Trixie's reach, because they looked extremely sharp, and she could do without anymore knife hole marks around the house. Linda and Amenadiel had brought her a posh bottle of wine and some lovely bath stuff. She never did have time to go to a Spa, so this was the next best thing. Ella, well Ella had got her a funny t-shirt, although Chloe thought Ella might have wanted it herself. Chloe wouldn't be wearing it out, but it made a great lounge-wear top at home.

She thanked everyone for her gifts. Just when she thought the gifting was over. Amenadiel approached her with a small wrapped up box, a small envelope and a larger one.

_"Umm..Thanks."_ her voice higher in pitch than she meant it to be, she was confused. She already had received gifts from everyone.

As she went to unwrap the small box first, Amenadiel interrupted her. Ensuring she opened the small envelope first. It was a plain bit of card, no picture- nothing. But she opened it, and began to read.

_My Dearest Detective,_

_First of all- Happy Birthday, Darling._

_I am sorry I couldn't be with you today. Therefore, I asked the help of my incapable brother and your little urchin to organise this day for you. I hope they have done a good job for you. I doubt it would be up to my standards, but it is the best I can do, being stuck down here._

_Next- Open up the small box. I hope it reminds you, that wherever I am, even down here. I am always thinking of you._

_Missing you, terribly so._

_Forever yours,_

_Lucifer. xx_

Chloe gulped, looking up at Amenadiel.

" _He asked me to write it for you."_ Amenadiel smiled, and Chloe watched on as Amenadiel and Trixie shared a knowing smile between the two of them. 

Chloe took a deep breath, trying to hold herself together as she opened up the small box. Inside, was a delicate bracelet. A small silver bar, accompanied by a silver chain. On closer inspection, she noticed it was engraved, simply with: ' _L &C'. _It was simple, but it was beautiful. 

She moved onto the final envelope, it was bigger this time. As she opened it up, she instantly recognised the familiar handwriting, it was Lucifer's. 

_My Dearest Detective & Offspring,_

_I wrote this letter, on the chance I may have to return to Hell. You will be reading this letter on the pretence that I have not been able to return. Therefore, my lawyers were informed, if I was to leave that my funds will be avaliable to you, as will LUX. Therefore, you will always be welcome to stay there, if you desire. Everything I have, is now yours, for you to do what you will._

_I hope you know, I would only return to Hell for the most serious of situations. One being, to keep you and Beatrice safe._

_Please remember- I will always be working out a way to get back to you. That is a promise, and we know that I never life._

_But, please be happy, for you._

_In the chance, that I never get back to you. Thank you for giving me the best time on Earth, and for letting me join you on those disastrously boring cases. What a Deckerstar team we were._

_I will forever regret, not telling you what you truly meant to me._

_It was always you, Chloe._

Chloe looked up from the letter, looking around at her friends who had gathered closer to her. All with a look of desperation in their eyes, patiently waiting to see her reaction. A single tear fell down her cheek, but she smiled. They all returned their smiles back to her, even Maze.

The afternoon continued, and Chloe managed to get Amenadiel alone.

_"Did he really ask you to organise all this?"_

Amenadiel let out a little chuckle. " _Me and Trixie had strict instructions. Only 90s jams, and the finest lemon bars for his Detective."_

They both laughed. She missed him, she missed having him with her. But knowing he had helped with all this, and with his over generous gifts, it made her feel like he was right with her, and for now that was good enough.

* * *

Chloe had enjoyed the rest of the afternoon, she had eaten so many lemon bars she could burst. They had all played games, they had drunk and she had laughed so much her belly hurt, mostly after Dan and Ella's 'Dance Off' competition.

As Trixie was getting ready for bed, Chloe cleaned up a few bits in the kitchen before heading to her daughters room to say goodnight. Her door was open just a creek. She could hear her talking and could just make out her on her knees, her elbows on her bed and her hands together. She had previously never heard Trixie pray, appreciated she needed her privacy, but this time, she couldn't help but listen in.

" _Lucifer! It's Trixie. We did such a great job with Mummy's party. We all had such a great time. Mummy looked so happy. She put the bracelet on as soon as we got home, she told me how much she loved it. She said it was beautiful. But she did say one thing... She wished you were there today, even though you would have moaned at having to sit on the floor and creasing up your suit...."_

Chloe rested the side of her head on the door frame, listening to her daughter rattle on to Lucifer. She giggled at the thought of Lucifer having to listen to her daughter's huge monologues about everything going on, even though she knew he probably secretly enjoyed it. 

Chloe headed up to her bedroom, she laid there for a moment. Feeling the slight weight of the new bracelet on her wrist, as she stared down at it she noticed for the first time the small diamond, shaped as a star glistening under the light of the lamp on her bedside table. Oh, it felt so bittersweet.

She needed to thank Lucifer, for giving her the best day without even being here. She knew, he might not reply. Sometimes he just didn't. Although, after all these month she had learnt to not get upset over it. She knew, for him sometimes it was just too difficult, just too painful to reply.

" _Lucifer. It's Chloe. I can't thank you enough for today- it was perfect! Turns out your brother isn't as incapable as you think he is. And your other letter. I am so grateful, at least you know I won't waste your money, I might buy myself a couple of new pairs of sensible brown shoes. But please, please try to hurry home. I miss you."_

She rolled over, gripping her phone and bringing up the selfie's of Lucifer up. Refreshing her memory of his face.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you enjoyed this chapter! Kudos & Comments are very much appreciated! Alongside any comments & Ideas.
> 
> Next Chapter- Will Include a near death experience... eek!


	7. Listen Before I Go

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A routine arrest warrant goes a little array...
> 
> Chloe's stuck somewhere, Lucifer doesn't know to help and everyone else is left trying to hold it together.

**Chapter Seven: Listen Before I Go**

_Listen Before I Go- Billie Eilish_

Dan and Chloe were stood outside a property. The Lieutenant had instructed them to break into a property, as they had an arrest warrant for a man, Julian. He was wanted for the murder of his wife. He had no previous convictions, not even a speeding ticket to his name. He wasn't known to have any firearms, just appeared to have been a crime of passion against his wife after he had discovered her affair. This was nothing new for the pair, they'd done warrants for arrests plenty of times. It should be an easy, go in, arrest him and home in time for tea.

Dan counted down, before busting the door down and entering the property. Dan went to the right inside the property heading into the lounge.

 _"CLEAR."_ He shouted.

Chloe had walked to the left of the property, entering the kitchen. She scanned it, no-one in sight. 

" _CLEAR"_ she responded, before carrying onto the dining area that looked over the garden. 

What Chloe didn't notice was Julian cowering in the corner of the dining room, but by the time she had heard the slight shuffle of Julian standing up, and the click of the trigger- it was too late.

She heard the distant shouts of Dan, as she lay on the wooden floor clutching her stomach, the overwhelming pain flooding her body as the blood seeped through the gaps in her fingers. She noticed the blood seeping through her shirt. She heard another bang, and watched Julian fall to the floor. If Julian was dead, she knew just where he was going. She heard Dan call for back-up and felt Dan as he kneeled beside her, and took her body in his arms.

 _"Chlo, Chlo..."_ He moved a strand of hair out of her face. " _You hang on in there okay?"_ Dan looked down at the blood steadily pouring out of her stomach. He took off his jacket, and pressed down as hard as he could to attempt to stem the bleeding. " _You'll be just fine, ambulance is on the way, and they will get you all patched up, okay?"_

This wasn't the first time Chloe had been shot. Yet, this time felt different. Her vision was blurring and she could feel the steady trickle of blood coming from her stomach. Through hazy eyes she could just make out the expression on Dan's face, she knew this was not looking good. Her eyes were beginning to feel heavier, but she could just about muster a small smile to Dan. " _Tell Trix, I love her."_

This had been one of Chloe's fears. Dying on the job, and leaving her daughter behind, just as what happened to her all those years ago, and she had never got over it.

Dan felt his eyes fill with tears, he tried so hard to keep the tears in. He loved Chloe, not in the way he had done once. But they were still family, they supported each other, they co-parented and he still thought of her as highly as he always had done. She couldn't die, not like this. She couldn't leave their daughter without a Mum, he knew it would ruin her. " _I won't need to, you can tell her. You'll be just fine."_

Chloe's eyes were fluttering to a close now. " _It hurts so much Dan, I'm scared."_ She wasn't ready to go, not yet. Especially, when life was just getting better again. She would never see Trixie grow up to be a young lady, never see her Graduate, never see her get married or have kids.

Dan stroked her face, as he witnessed the life slowly drain from Chloe in front of his eyes. Although, he was glad she would have not died alone and that he had been with her. But the memory of holding her and seeing her like this, would haunt him for the rest of his life.

Before he knew it, the ambulance crew stormed the property and took over. Dan was basically thrown backwards into the kitchen. He stood and watched on, as they desperately worked to try and save her life. She had stopped breathing, and they performed CPR. 

He felt like he was stuck in a nightmare, and for the first time he wished Lucifer was her. Dan didn't quite know what it was about him, it was like he was bloody bulletproof most the time, but maybe, just maybe if he was here, he would have done a better job at protecting Chloe than he had done.

Someone led Dan away, and he found himself outside on the path. His phone rang, it was Ella.

" _Dan, I heard something happened. What's going on?"_

Dan could hardly get the words out. " _Chloe. It's bad."_ he choked the words out through the tears. And for one of the first times, Ella was speechless.

Dan spent a painful half an hour pacing the street. But took a sigh of relief as he saw Chloe wheeled out on a hospital bed, and not a black body bag. Thank God, she was still hanging on in there.

Dan ran towards her, desperate to just be by her side. The ambulance crew informed him, she was critical and now in a coma. He jumped into the ambulance and took the seat next to his ex-wife. He grasped her hand in his, she was cold and an oxygen mask covered her pale face. The only sign of life was the very slight rise and fall of her chest. But right now, Dan relished in that. Chloe, had always been the strongest woman he had ever come across, and here she was defying the odds.

* * *

Chloe eyes fluttered open. She looked around, everything around her was black, completely black. She felt no pain, no aches. Just nothing. She looked down at her stomach, there were no signs that she had been shot, not a spot of blood on her. Again, just nothing.

Chloe pushed herself up off the floor, and began walking. Yet, everything was still black. She couldn't work out how far she walked, it all just seemed an endless landscape.

“ _DAN? DAN? Are you here?”_

**Silence.**

She tried desperately to piece up her last memories, to come up with some explanation of what was going on. She kept calling for Dan, which turned into desperate screams. Why wasn't he answering her? He'd been with her just a moment ago. Then, there was only one person, she could try to reach.

" _Lucifer! Lucifer, I don't know where I am."_

**Silence.**

Was she dead? Was this Hell? Or Heaven? Nothing was making any sense.

Then a voice brought her out of her thoughts.

“ _Detective, is that you?”_

Chloe, just burst into tears, hearing his voice. It was a flood of relief. " _You can hear me? Everything is black, I don’t know where I am.”_

After feeling the oncoming prayer, Lucifer had rushed to his penthouse he created in Hell. The prayer felt different, like it wasn’t from Earth. The usual tingle in his body from a prayer from Earth was instead coming through more painful, like tiny sharp pains covering his entire body.

_“I’m here, I can hear you Detective. What do you mean, you don’t know where you are? You haven’t just passed out on a night out with Maze have you? You really should be careful if you’re drinking with her…”_

Typical Lucifer, took every opportunity to make a joke. Part of it soothed her, but the panic was too strong. 

“ _I was on a case with Dan, I was shot but then I woke up. But there’s nothing here, everything is just dark.”_

Lucifer felt the blood drain from his body. He knew exactly where she was. His eyes fired up red. Someone had harmed his Detective and he had not been there to protect her.

“ _You are in, the in-between”_ his voice barley came out as a whisper.

“ _What?”_ Chloe began to panic again.

“ _It’s the space between Earth and Heaven or Hell. Whatever the outcome.”_

**Silence.**

“ _So, I’m not dead?”_ She had a million questions, she wasn’t quite sure to be relieved she wasn’t dead or terrified she still wasn’t a hundred percent alive.

There was a slight pause before Lucifer replied. _“No, not quite.”_ Lucifer’s hands were clenched now, the overwhelming feeling to just destroy everything in his path. But he knew, that wouldn’t help him or the Detective. He needed to find a way to get her soul back.

“ _I never got to see you again.”_ Chloe whispered. Lucifer, always had said she would go to Heaven, and that was somewhere he could not follow. That hope, that one day she would see him once more had potentially been taken away. Although, she knew in a very long time from now, she would be reunited with her Trixie, and she knew if Heaven awaited her, she could finally give her a Dad a cuddle again.

 _“Now c’mon Detective, this doesn’t mean it is the end. You’ve got that urchin of yours to get back to. I want you to promise me something Detective.”_ Lucifer, ran his fingers through his hair, desperately pacing, trying to think of every possibility he could do to help. _“If you feel a pulling sensation, let your soul go back, to your body that is. But for now, just close your eyes and rest. And I’ll… I’ll speak to someone.”_

Chloe knew, that him saying ‘he’ll speak to someone’ it wasn’t going to be someone residing in Hell, it would be one of his celestial family members, maybe even his Dad. If anyone was going to save her, it would be Lucifer. She curled up on the floor, closing her eyes.

_“If I get through this, will you be there when I wake up?”_

**Silence.**

_“I’ll try my best.”_ he replied.

She closed her eyes, and the darkness became even greater.

* * *

Dan had been sat at Chloe's bedside for a few hours now. She was, for now stable but in critical condition. Dan was sat at her bedside, clinging onto her hand. His heart broke at the sight in front of him. She was hooked up to machines left, right and centre. The only sound, was of the heart rate machine which filled the silence between his speaking. He spoke to Chloe. About their first meeting, he laughed bittersweetly at their first date, especially when he managed to trip and spill a beer all over some hefty motorbike type guy, and nearly got himself in a bar fight. He spoke about their wedding, about Trixie.

_“I’m just sorry I messed up so bad, Chlo. If anyone’s going to get through this, it’s you.”_

Dan looked down at his hands intertwined with hers, as he gently stroked his fingers over her hands. He knew she liked that, she always had done.

* * *

Dan didn't want to leave Chloe alone at hospital, but after a distraught Trixie had rang him off Linda's phone, was who babysitting her, he knew he had a duty to be there for his daughter.

He knocked on Linda's door, greeted by Amenadiel who opened it with a nod, before ushering him in to see Trixie cuddled up with Linda, he could hear his daughters sobs.

“ _Trixie..”_ He whispered. Trixie looked up, her big brown eyes now tinted red. She ran into her Dad’s arms, and Dan held on so tight, it wasn’t long before he was crying too.

Dan sat Trixie on the sofa, sitting in front of her, holding her hands tight.

“ _Is Mummy going to be okay?”_ Trixie asked with pure desperation in her eyes.

Dan gripped the bridge of his nose, caught between wanting to lie, wanting to tell Trixie everything was absolutely fine, or to tell the truth, that he wasn’t sure. But he knew Trixie, she wasn’t a silly little girl, if he lied she would read right through him. As he stared back at her, her eyes told a thousand words.

Dan gulped and gripped her hands tighter. _“Monkey, I’ll always be honest with you, and you know whatever happens…”_

 _“Just tell me Dad!”_ Trixie barked in reply, taking Dan by surprise he could not remember a time Trixie had even raised her voice, but he understood.

“ _I don’t know.”_ He rubbed his hands over his face. “ _She’s stable now, but doctors are saying it’s still not… it’s still not hundred percent certain she’ll make it through.”_

Dan watched as Trixie took the information in, almost seeing the cogs in her brain processing it. Dan looked over to Linda, looking for some sort of confirmation he had said the right thing. Linda wiped away a stray tear, and gave Dan a nod of her head.

Trixie stood up. “ _I need to do something.”_ Before running off in the direction of the bathroom.

Dan looked confused and began to follow her before Linda stopped him. “ _Let her go, she’ll be okay. Sit down, I’ll get you a coffee.”_ As Linda went to make a coffee, Amenadiel followed her.

“ _I’ll sit with Dan, just go and make sure Trixie is okay. She’s probably praying to…”_

 _“Lucifer”_ Amenadiel and Linda said in unison.

Amenadiel stood outside the bathroom, placing his ear to the door to hear little Trixie's voice.

“ _Lucifer, it’s Trixie. You need to help Mummy. Daddy said the Doctors aren’t sure she’s going to get better. I don’t want Mummy to die. I’ve already lost you, I can’t lose her too. Please, Lucifer. Please help save her.”_

Amenadiel found himself standing by the bathroom door now, closing his eyes. Desperately trying to get through to his brother. He was brought back to reality when the bathroom opened, making both him and Trixie jump.

“ _Do you think he’ll help?”_ Trixie asked. Amenadiel lowered himself, so he was now eye-to-eye with her.

“ _He’d do anything for your Mum. If anyone can help, it’s him.”_

Trixie smiled sadly “ _Are you praying to him too?”_

Amenadiel nodded, before Trixie wrapped her arms around him. “ _I wish he was here, then maybe Mummy would be ok.”_

Amenadiel held onto little Trixie a little tighter. He knew, if his place was swapped with Lucifer, and if it was Charlie he was dealing with, he’d like to think (even though Lucifer hated children) that he would do the same. He backed off from her slightly, putting her hands on her shoulders. “ _Trixie, I know my brother will do anything in his power to look after your Mum, so don’t you worry, okay?”_

Trixie wiped the tears off her face with the back of her hands, and gave Amenadiel a smile. “ _Thank you.”_ She said, barely a whisper, before she ran back to her Dad and Linda.

Dan and Linda were sitting on the sofa, both holding steaming cups of coffee. Dan had filled Linda in, on everything had happened. Since Ella was the one to call Linda, and arrange for her to have Trixie with Dan’s permission, of course. Linda, was shocked, scared, upset. But trying to keep celestial talk out of the un-knowing Dan.

* * *

Lucifer was still pacing the penthouse, he was already onto his third prayer to his father, but had no response. He'd also tried Ramiel, Gabriel, Castiel, Raphael and Azrael. Trying desperatly to get through to anyone, but it appeared to all be in vain.

As he took a sip of whisky, he heard Trixie's voice.

“ _I don’t want Mummy to die. I’ve already lost you, I can’t lose her too. Please, Lucifer. Please help save her.”_

He threw his glass, with all his might, and watched as it smashed against the bar. It was all too much. What could he do? Just wait and see whether Chloe would make it through or not? He thought about Trixie, the thought of her, living the rest of her long life without her mother there to guide her, she would no longer sit at the kitchen praying to her mother for her favourite chocolate cake, or lay in her bed as her Mum read her favourite bedtime story. He’d seen the hurt in Chloe’s eyes when she spoke about losing her father, and he most certainly did not want Trixie to go through the same.

Lucifer then heard the voice of Amenadiel. “ _Brother, I am guessing you have heard from Trixie. I’m trying to get through to our brothers and sisters, I’ve tried Dad. I am sure you are doing everything in your power to help. If you need me I’m here.”_

Lucifer took some deep breaths, as he headed out to his makeshift balcony of his LUX in Hell. As he gripped onto the rail, he looked up.

“ _Dad. This is the last and final time, I need your help. Give me a sign, there must be something I can do. I don’t care if I have to stay in Hell for the rest of time, just please, there must be something I can do to save Chloe’s life.”_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you enjoyed this chapter! :) 
> 
> Next chapter, Lucifer gets a visit from someone very important. It was probably one of my favourite parts I have written so far.
> 
> Thanks again for all your kudos and comments (you readers are amazing!!)


	8. Waking Up

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lucifer has an important visitor!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the little wait for this chapter, unfortunately my university work gets in the way of my writing.
> 
> Thanks again for all your comments, kudos etc <3

**Chapter Eight: Waking Up**

_Waking Up- MJ Cole & Freya Ridings_

Lucifer had been left reeling. He had tried praying, he had tried to think of every possible avenue he could go to help the Detective. But he was coming up blank. He sat on the piano, playing the odd keys as he tried desperately to think of some way to get Chloe's soul back to earth-side once again. She did not deserve this.

He sipped his whisky, when he heard the elevator ding and the doors open.

_"Dromos, if that is you, I suggest you go back to whatever hole you crawled out of."_

**Silence.**

Lucifer placed his whisky, in its usual place on top of the piano, before turning around on the stool. There stood a man, in his late 30's possibly early 40's, with dark blonde hair and wearing a casual jeans and a t-shirt.

 _“Can I help you?”_ Lucifer scowled, certainly in the mood for no visitors. He had thinking to do, more praying to do. Not waste time on whoever the hell this was.

As the man walked closer to him, Lucifer realised he was eerily familiar. Of course, a lot of people to him were familiar. He had been around since the beginning of time, he had met millions of people and slept with a large proportion of them. But he could not quite put his finger on where he recognised this man.

The guy was now standing directly in front of him. Lucifer, noticed the very subtle golden glow surrounding him. He was not from Hell, and he most certainly was not meant to be here either, he was heaven sent.

“ _John Decker.”_ The man extended his hand out to him. As soon as Lucifer heard the name, he shot up, quickly smoothing the creases out of his suit.

Lucifer couldn't quite believe it. John Decker. Chloe's beloved father. He took his hand, shaking it firmly. He could now see Chloe's slight resemblance in her father. He felt a rush of emotion. He had heard her speak about her father on many occasions, she always spoke about him with so much love and admiration, but he saw the hurt in her eyes too.

“ _It’s a pleasure to meet you, drink?”_ Lucifer began walking to the bar. “ _Whisky? It’s all I’ve got, and down here it doesn’t taste too good, not like where you’re from.”_

John let out a chuckle, agreeing to some whisky, before taking a seat on a stall, while Lucifer stood behind the bar. Lucifer slid John his drink, and they clinked their glasses together before both taking a sip.

John broke the silence.

“ _I know what’s happened.”_ John stated as he put his drink back on the bar.

Lucifer felt a lump form in his throat. _“I don’t… I don’t know how to help.”_ Lucifer had thought it was difficult leaving Chloe to return to Hell, but he realised this might be worse. Knowing that he had not been able to protect her, that she was hardly holding onto life and there was not a single thing he could do about it.

 _“Your father sent me.”_ Lucifer’s eyes rolled at the mention of his father, because well…. Of course he’ll have some manipulative plan stuck up his sleeve, he should have seen this coming. “ _Chloe getting shot today, it was never meant to happen, it is not her time. He wants you to return to Chloe, spend her life with you by her side.”_

 _“I can’t, I can’t leave Hell…”_ Lucifer choked out, he tried desperately to keep the tears in, gripping onto his glass till his knuckles went white.

“ _Lucifer- your Dad said that Hell does not need a warden anymore. You are free to return to Chloe.”_

Lucifer, hadn’t realised but a single tear had started to roll down his cheek. Here it was, permission to return to the woman that had flooded his thoughts for so long. He felt his knees go weak, just at thought of seeing her face again, holding her tight. He wanted to spill out all his fears, all his reservations, all the reasons why he couldn’t return, she might no longer what him, or loved him. He wouldn’t blame her, it had been a long time. But he knew, it would break his heart.

_“I’ve seen bits, watched you both from time to time. We both know how strong my little monkey is, but without you- she’s been suffering. She needs you and she loves you more than I’ve seen her love anyone in her existence, barring little Trixie. So please, return to her. And tell her, when she wakes up, for her old Dad- that I love her and Beatrice too.”_

Lucifer could hardly control the thoughts buzzing around his brain. Chloe had been shot, she wasn’t dead but she wasn’t exactly fully alive, really. And here was her father, standing in front of him giving him a message from his own further, telling him he was allowed to go home, home to Chloe.

“ _This isn’t some trick is it?”_

John took a swig of his drink and chuckled a little. “ _Not at all. Your Dad just thought it might be better for the message to come from me, rather than him. Plus, if my daughter’s going to date the Devil, thought I better see what he’s like.”_

Lucifer smiled, and felt John’s hand on his shoulder. “ _You make my little girl happy, and that’s all I could ask for as a father. Please be there for her when she wakes up.”_

Lucifer nodded and smiled at the man, and with that, he was gone.

* * *

Chloe opened her eyes, and felt the disappointment to find herself still in the in-between. She felt cold, so, so cold.

“ _Lucifer”_ she called out, but barely came out as a whisper.

“ _Detective, I’m here.”_ He replied. His voice felt like a warm blanket coving her up, protecting her. She was so grateful to be able to hear his voice.

“ _I’m still here, I’m so cold.”_

_“Chloe, it’s going to be okay. I promise you, and you know I don’t lie.”_

That was true, he did never lie. But she worried that maybe he wasn’t telling the whole truth either. I mean she could be okay, she could go to heaven and be ‘okay’ But she also knew, that would mean, no Trixie and no hope of seeing Lucifer again. He was banned from Heaven, and if she was to go there- he could not follow and that wasn’t worth even thinking about.

* * *

Dan had returned to Chloe's bedside after Trixie had assured him, she would be fine with Amenadiel and Linda. He awoke and stretched out his back, falling asleep in hospital chairs, were not ideal. He took a look at Chloe, not much had changed. She was still deathly pale, but the heart rate monitor continued to beep steadily and he felt a wave of relief. Even though, her body was covered in wires, and it was difficult to tell where they started and where they ended. Trixie, had wanted to visit her Mum, but Dan had persuaded her otherwise. He would not wish anyone to see their loved ones in this state. And, if Chloe was to die, he wanted Trixie's last memories to be happy ones, and not the view that was in front of him.

He brought his attention to the door that slowly opened.

It was Lucifer.

He was back.

Dan felt a surge of different emotions. Relief, sadness, anger... more anger than anything. Even Dan wished Lucifer had been there that day. Because, whatever it was about Lucifer, he seemed to do a better job of protecting Chloe than he did, if he was here than maybe her getting shot wouldn't have happened. He sprung out of the chair, storming towards Lucifer before pushing him will full force with both hands into his chest. However, for Lucifer it only made him stumble a single step backwards.

_“You just think you can turn back up? Hey? I watched her fucking die- they had to bring her back. And look at her now, they don’t know if she’s going to make it. If you were here you could have…”_

Dan didn't quite know to say. What could Lucifer have done, really? But Dan still found himself angrily hitting his chest. And Lucifer let him, he understood. He should have been there, he should have protected her. Dan started to run out of breath and Lucifer placed a strong hand on his shoulder and Dan's anger subsided a little bit. He looked up Lucifer, he looked like shit, well for him anyway. His suit was filthy, his usually preened hair was all over the place and was covered in something which looked like ash? It was the first time Dan had noticed he had curly hair, and then he noticed the look in his eyes, mostly because he knew it mirrored his. The fear, the worry, the anger and the sadness. 

Dan took a step back, and nervously looked down at his feet.

_“I’m sorry man. It’s not your fault. It’s just…”_

Lucifer, didn’t know what possessed him to do it, but he grabbed Dan and engulfed him in a hug.

“ _You look like you could do with a decent sleep, get back to Trixie. I’ll stay here.”_ Dan didn’t really want to leave Chloe. But on the other hand, he wanted to see his little girl, and Lucifer was right, he could really do with a decent sleep.

Lucifer noticed the worried look on his face. “ _I won’t leave her side, you have my word.”_

Dan nodded, before looking back at Chloe. He slowly walked up to her, placing a kiss on her forehead. “ _I’ll be back soon.”_ And with that Dan, walked out, giving Lucifer a tap on the arm as he left.

Lucifer stood near the door of Chloe’s hospital room. He looked over to Chloe, the only indication she was alive was the movement of her chest. He felt like he was paralysed on the spot, just staring at her.

Lucifer, loved being in control and relished in it. But at this moment in time, he had never felt so out of control. Watching the love of his life, laying there like that broke his heart more than the last few thousand years they had been apart. He prayed, this wasn’t an awful trick from his Dad, and he would take her away from him for good.

His shaking legs walked over to the chair that Dan had been sat on. He shuffled it forward, getting as close to her as he could. He nervously reached for her hand, almost worried she would break, or she wasn’t real. As he held her hand in his, her fingers twitched. He could have sworn he felt her squeeze his hand, just a little bit.

* * *

Chloe opened her eyes, still darkness surrounding her. But something was different, she could sense something, something was different. Compared to earlier she was warm again, and she felt a slight pressure on her right hand, as if someone was holding it.

 _“Lucifer?”_ She called out.

**Silence.**

_“Lucifer, can you hear me?”_ The desperation in her voice, she needed to hear his voice. It felt like she had been in this ‘in-between’ for so long now, she had no concept of time. Had it been hours, days, weeks, years. She had no idea. But she dreamed, of being at home. She dreamed of being sat on the sofa, Trixie cuddled up with her. Lucifer, coming in with pizza and chocolate cake.

“ _Yes Detective.”_ He stroked his fingers over her hand lightly. Chloe felt it, not properly but she felt it.

“ _Are you with me? Things feel different, it’s like you are here but I can’t see you. It’s like I can feel you here.”_

Lucifer swept a stray piece of her from her face “ _I’m right here, darling.”_

Chloe wanted to cry, but the tears wouldn’t come.

Suddenly, she had to squint at the bright light which flooded her vision. The darkness was gone and was consumed by the purest white light she had ever seen.

Lucifer watched as the once still body of Chloe began to shake violently.

“ _Lucifer, it’s so bright.”_

Lucifer knew was happening, and his heart jumped into his throat.

“ _Chloe, ignore it. Whatever you do- do not go into that light. Just close your eyes, concentrate on my voice.”_

But Chloe was struggling to concentrate. The light was blinding, like it wanted to consume her. She always thought the ‘enter the bright light thing’ was a myth.

Lucifer saw the compulsions got worse, and he had no choice but to press the red button above her bed, sounding an alarm and the Doctors flooded in, within seconds. Pushing him out the way, and he was now stood by the window, he closed his eyes.

“ _Chloe, listen to me. This isn’t your time. Do not go near the light. Stay here, I’m right here, I’m waiting for you.”_

**No reply.**

The Doctors continued to work on her, Lucifer couldn’t work out what they were trying to do with so many of them over her now, he could just about make out her face in the crowd of Doctors.

“ _Chloe… please. Please stay here.”_

**Nothing.**

_“The light’s gone.”_ As soon as she said those words, the Doctors sighed in relief and took a step back, she was stable once again. Lucifer himself let out a big breath, not even noticing he was holding it in.

The Doctors explained, this was normal in her condition, but she was stable once again. Lucifer pulled the chair next to her again, holding her hand. He noticed she dribbled a little from her fit. He pulled out his pocked square, dabbing it slightly.

Lucifer didn’t know how much time had passed, but he was woken up by the feeling of Chloe’s hand tightening around his hand and some faint noises. He sat bolt up-right, noticing Chloe’s eyes were now wide open, he watched as she was trying desperately to talk. Her eyes were filled with a look of shock and fear. But Lucifer smiled softly. “ _Now there you are, darling.”_ He watched as her panic subsided slightly.

“ _Lucifer.”_ She managed to just about choke out. He stroked her hair slightly and placed a kiss on her forehead.

“ _I’m right here.”_ He whispered.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you liked this chapter- I really enjoyed writing Lucifer & John's meeting. 
> 
> Took us 8 chapters, but our couple are finally reunited!
> 
> Thank you for all your kudos and comments! <3


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